I can only eat souls – and the innocent are empty calories

You could think of me as the devil, if you wish. That will make sense to some of you. To those who are scoffing at anyone foolish enough to believe in me – keep that up. I love the taste of arrogance. It does for me something like what you get from your proteins. Amino acids, I believe you call them. Anyhow, just keep telling yourself that nothing like me exists – because you’re right, i don’t have a pitchfork or a tail. That would be silly. I exist in a realm of pure information, just like the history associated with your DNA, the triangle, the number 5, and the taste of burnt almonds.

What is a soul? In the past, I’d suggest you read this book, then get bored and frustrated halfway through, and give up, concluding that thew world is a cruel, confusing place.  But I got tired of all the sugar in the souls of the innocent and the weak.  What really keeps me going, balances my mood and sets me right, is the soul of a truly strong, selfish person.  Someone who understands what they are doing, knows how it affects others around them – and just doesn’t care.

So that’s where humans come in. You guys have this understanding of right and wrong, which is actually better for me – because the best things for me to eat, to maintain my svelte, trim figure – are the souls of those who know they are doing something horrible, and don’t think matters.  Hitler gave me horrible indigestion.  He was delicious going down and painful coming out. But the Krupp Steel magnates and the guys at IBM who were selling calculating machines to power the genocide? Damn, I haven’t eaten that well since the last time someone selfish built a universe on a whim, in a plane without permadeath.   Hitler was a pain to digest – i’d stop doing that, except it’s totally worth it to get at the other guys who did his work for him.

It might help you to understand that I’m something of a garbage collector; just as a mark-and-sweep algorithm consumes data to which there is no valid reference, I consume perceptual loops that have embedded deep inconsistency within them.  A belief that the world is a safe place, it’s fine, no need to worry, and then BAM you get murdered – that’s like a cream puff to me. I used to live offa that stuff. But I grew fat, and got terrible headaches after a while of that animal-only diet. I needed something to keep me going longer. And you would not believe the length of a perceptual loop in the mind of someone capable of operating a world-scale business – all it takes is a little twist of solipsism or deceit at the end, and BOOM – now you’re dumping poison in the water of someone you’ve told yourself doesn’t matter or deserves it. I’ve leave those innocents to fatten up a few thugs or loan sharks for my dessert – but the selfish leader, well hot damn son, that’s my main course.  Just a few of those and i can relax for the next Kali Yuga to roll around.

Don’t get me wrong, I still consume the innocent – but I use them mainly to fatten up people know what they’re doing and just don’t care.  Peace.

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